PAD Challenge Day 26: Missed Calls
PAD Challenge Day 26: Write a response.
I miss calls from my father.
On Sundays, before and after
church and during football,
basketball, and baseball games.
During the week,
on break or late at night
to see how my day went.
On the weekend,
to share our adventures
and experiences with
people, places and things.
I miss missed calls from my father.
He would always leave a voice-mail to say,
"Baby Girl, it's your daddy.
You know I love you.
You must be mad at me.
Call me back anyway."
I would listen and laugh
because sometimes I was mad,
mad at him for being so far away
when I needed a hug
or his shoulder the most.
Mad at him for something he said
that irritated my skin and overturned my nerves.
Mad when he forgot about something important---
I would repeat myself twice or a third time.
Him, knowingly knowing
that I despised repeating myself
On the days I wasn't mad,
honestly, I was occupied
and focused on growing
into the woman I haven't met.
Honestly, I was in a meeting
trying to save the world.
Honestly, I was in class
trying to be PhinisHeD
with the Doctorate I'd started.
Honestly, I was in a waiting room--
waiting to be called back to see my oncologist,
when I rather be waiting on,
preparing for a flight to an island,
Instead of being attached to a medical device
trying to save myself from death.
Honestly, I was beating the cancer I told
my mother not to tell him about,
only because his heart was already
upside down from his mother
battling the same cells.
Imagine being the baby he helped create
and you never disappointed him or your mother;
and the woman that birthed him
and loved him the most,
both in a war,
that even the most bravest
and daredevil of man on earth
couldn't prevent the pain they endured
or win what was called for them to fight for.
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